The week in review

Well, the title was originally going to be “The week in review”, but I guess at this point it’s been more like two. To those to whom I promised an update at the beginning of this week, I am quite sorry. I had a huge exam on Wednesday (which I most certainly did not do well on), and had hundreds of pages of reading to do for it. And the one time I took a quick study break to blog some short proof of life, Internet Explorer died and I lost what I had written. And to those with whom I was trying to talk online early this week, I sincerely apologize for disappearing; the internet at my friend’s house died and we couldn’t figure out how to fix it. At any rate, it’s been an exciting two weeks, and if you have the stamina to read about it, then continue.

I left for Santiago immediately after posting the last entry and got to see my host family’s family. First we visited my host cousin and her newborn daughter. My host cousin and her husband also have a two-year-old son who was in that cute trying-to-talk stage, and the grandmother was there as well (my host aunt? it’s hard to keep track) to help out. I finally had my first Chilean Mama experience. I am the third student my host mother has had, so I think she’s accustomed to not forcing food down poor foreigners throats, which is usually quite pleasant. It was great to have the experience, however, of being in a house where the food was just overflowing from the table. Let’s not joke around, it’s my equivalent of heaven.

After my host cousin’s house, I went to my host grandparents’ house where we spent the night. It wasn’t huge, and it certainly wasn’t warm (in case I’ve forgotten to mention it, buildings here don’t have heat, and Santiago gets COLD at night), but it was so homey. It was really nice because it reminded me a lot of visiting my real grandma in the Pocono’s – a house that seems not to have changed in ages, with all the colors of the ‘70s in all the furniture. But more than anything else, it was like Grandma’s house because of the cousin’s that lived right next-door, just like Bridget and Maggie do! It was so much fun to feel like I was interacting with a big family again, with tons of people talking and laughing and eating tons!

This week was slightly less easy. I have to say I felt a few more pangs of homesickness than usual. Most of that is because on Wednesday, it was finally decided that I definitely had fleas. That’s right, fleas. You may have thought only dogs get them, but here in Chile, it’s quite common for people to have those itchy, pesky insects – you often get them from the micros (busses). That was definitely a Caitlin-where-the-heck-are-you kind of day. I’m certainly not the first person in my program to have them either, which makes it slightly easier to laugh about. I hope you are all able to do the same with me and not disown me for my parasitic visitors.

And on that note, an amusing conversation relayed to me by Lucy, from when she told her mother over the phone that she had fleas…
Lucy: Mom, I have fleas.
Lucy’s Mom: Fleas?
Lucy: Yeah, a lot of us on the program have them. You can get them from the micros.
LM: Do people, like, bring live chickens on?
Lucy: No, Mom, the people here have fleas.
LM: Oh. Wow.

A change of sheets later, however, I’m moving on. And quite in time, since the Fiesta Naval military ball was on Saturday night. Rewind for one moment to Friday night, when Sara, Ashley, and I went out with our dates to a bar since Ashley and Sara hadn’t met theirs yet. (Sara was originally going to go with Luis, whom she danced with at the club last week, but he decided not to take her after she dodged every one of his kiss attempts.) We had a relatively good time, a group setting where there was much less pressure to avoid awkward dancing. The only highlight of the night was when my date asked me if I liked my hair the length it is and then had a short but direct discussion with the other two guys about how girl’s hair should be longer. Cool.

So Saturday night when we went to the ball, my expectations weren’t high, but I was at least excited to be getting dressed up. I knew there would be good reason to bring my Chambers dress to Chile. Ashley and I headed to Sara’s house to get changed and do makeup, hair, etc…basically to be girly for a little bit. We got there around 7:40 because our dates told us Friday that they would pick us up at 8:30. As soon as we walk in the door, however, Sara tells us that Luis called to say he’s be there at 8. Not optimal, but 20 minutes is still plenty for a girl to get ready, so we set to work. Then, around 10 or 5 to 8, we got another call saying that Jean Pierre would be coming to pick up his date too. Now, our dates were named Christian, Matthias, Luis, Sebastian, and Benjamin. There was no Jean Pierre. It turns out the military isn’t real big on advanced warning, and they wanted us to find another girl to go to the ball with this last guy. Super. Luckily, a friend of Daniela’s was at the house, and we threw her in a skirt and black shirt with some makeup quickly and were ready to go. Us American chicks are resourceful.

We were taking a van-type car with driver that the boys had rented, which made us all quite happy since we had been nervous about what we would do if our dates drank too much, something that we knew was almost a definite. Of course, the boys showed up in full uniform, being a formal military event, which just made the whole evening a lot more comical. Overall, it was a really great time. The food was good, the music was fun, and the whole place was really well decorated. Sure, maybe we weren’t the perfect dates in terms of what military men are looking for – Sara scolded them as being culturally insensitive for saying Chinese and Japanese food are all the same thing, and I attempted to explain to my date my opinions on anti-gay policies in the military – but we still made it through the night with smiles on all faces. I was also happy to have gone out with them the week before – I knew all of Cristian’s moves so that I could easily dodge kisses and attempts to grind. Sometimes it’s definitely in a woman’s advantage to have a bad dancing partner, especially if she’s the type who naturally tries to lead. I made up my mind early on in the night that there would be no making out on the dance floor, no attempts of his to put my hands on his butt (who dances like that?!), and we were all better off for it. I was also much more comfortable knowing that we had had the pololeando conversation the week before – the we’re-not-dating-and-here’s-why conversation…I thought.

Towards the end of the dance, Christian began trying to tell me something. The music being really loud (and the language being Spanish), I could barely make out what he was saying. So I dragged him outside to some tables and said, “Alright, what are you trying to say.” What follows is a loose translation of the whole conversation since it’s just too good to miss out on. I decided to be firm, I decided to be strong…I decided to lie my heart out. I took my little white lie of an “andandte” (boyfriend) from the week before and made it a theatrical work (and played the part rather well I must say).

Christian, Chilean Military Man (of a whole 19 years of age): Remember what we talked about last week?
Me, US Seductress that you know I am: We talked about a lot of things last week…other American students… (he gives me a look)…pololeando (dating)?
C: Yeah.
M: What about it?
C: Are we?
M: I told you last week, I have an andante (less serious boyfriend).
C: Yeah, so?
M: Well (and this is where I decided to pull out all the stops), Christian, I don’t know you very well, but I’m going to confide something in you: I think I’m in love with my andante. We’ve been talking a lot, and I really just want to be with him. And while I’m not sure yet if he feels the same way, I just can’t go out with anyone else while I’m so in love with him.
C: But he’s very far away, and you’re here until December.
M: Yes, but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m in love. It just wouldn’t be right for me to go out with anyone else right now. (He looks frustrated.) Besides, you don’t like short hair.
C: That doesn’t matter.
M: It’s just not right. But you’re my friend, right?
C: (He corrects a grammatical error I made in the last sentence, and then,) yeah, sure.
M: Let’s go dance…

And that’s the point at which he started looking moody. Luckily there were about 10 minutes of songs left, and then a short drive home, but he was not exactly a happy camper. I’m hoping the fact that his friend made fun of him in the car had more to do with it than I did, but you never know. I’m quite the heartbreaker :-P. He was able to perk up enough on the way home to ask how old my blonde sister was…I quickly told him not old enough (not to mention way to far away). My estimation of the whole situation is lonely military boys who have to move fast given that they only have the weekends to do any moving whatsoever. Still, it’s certainly a funny story to write home about.

I wonder if they realize how funny we all think the uniform makes the situation…This was taken at the end of the night, after Sara sat her date down and told him a similar story to mine that wasn’t a lie, he got drunk and decided to test out his English, and Ashley effectively dodged attempted kisses and “you’re super beautiful” compliments. Really, who says that? And yes, those are stuffed dogs in our hands – presents from the military academy.


Ashley and I decided to have our own after-party at her house, formal dress optional.

One lesson to take from the whole experience is that dating in Chile is just not an option for me. The male-female relations here are so foreign to me that unless I found a really progressive man, I can’t ever imagine fitting the cultural requirements of a girlfriend, nor can I imagine wanting to have a culturally adequate man. And these are not the type of norms people step out of a whole lot. While Chile is a very modern country in many ways, women are still expected to serve men, men to look after women. Men are always given their food first at meals (thank God I live in a house of just women and don’t have to see it every day), the women are to make sure they are comfortable and happy. It was not acceptable for me to go to the bathroom by myself at the naval ball, Christian had to accompany me and wait at the door. And while I was going out with some pretty rigid boys in a rather strict setting, even in the most seemingly normal of houses, girls go as far as to break their boyfriends crackers apart for them, because that’s what is supposed to be done. Perhaps I’m not describing it very well, but please believe me when I say the interaction is just completely foreign to me.

And to end, because I’ve once again blabbed on for quite a long time, I’ve ventured into the Pacific Ocean for the first time! I’ve been told that it’s never really warm enough to swim here and that the water is some of the coldest in the world, but I’ve at least put my feet in. And really, just the fact that the weather is getting better and I can walk and sit by the ocean is good enough for me!






Sooo much cooler than Chilean Military Men. When Lynnae and I were on the beach taking these pictures, a little girl about Brianna’s age came up to us and asked if we were “on holiday”. Woohoo for little kids with British accents and being by the beach.